Facebook Aphorisms

For my friend and aphorisms mentor A.Q.

1. On Facebook you can’t leave your past behind. Nor can you leave your future.

2. To post or not to post, that's not the question.

3. Home is where most of your Facebook friends live.

4. A friend is someone whose latest Facebook picture doesn't surprise you.

5. On Facebook, all that is serious melts into air.

6. All is fair in love and Facebook—except mixing them.

7. On Facebook, everyone is a fascist or a god; or a fascist god.

8. Those who post a lot or not at all are equally bored with their lives.

9. Friends use Facebook exactly the way you imagined they would. The rest are not really your friends.

10.  On Facebook, you should also befriend your enemies. It may come in handy to know their whereabouts.

11. If you are happy and you know it don’t post it—it’s depressing.

12. Two-thirds of your Facebook friends are specters who haunt you when you least expect it. The other third haunts you on a regular basis.

13. For the eager Facebook user, the present is the time elapsing between her current post and the next one.

14. If a couple constantly posts how much they love each other on Facebook, they either don’t love each other or we don't know what love is.

15. Persuading or convincing someone through Facebook is as difficult as determining the exact amount of grains of sand in the planet, and as futile as knowing it.

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